Nada al-Ahdal, 11 Year Old Yemeni Girl
بِسۡمِ ٱللهِ ٱلرَّحۡمَـٰنِ ٱلرَّحِيمِ ,
Recently, the case of an 11 year old Yemeni girl was brought to light and it has been making airwaves since. However, some persons have chosen to use this poor girl’s experience as an excuse to malign Islam. However, in appealing to the girl – she herself never blamed Islam but that of the cultural practises of her parents – in fact she even begins the very video by invoking the Islamic greeting of ‘Salaam ‘Alaykum’. Islam is clear that forced marriages are haram (read: impermissible) and that such marriages contravene Islamic law:
Mufti Ebrahim Desai says on one who is forced to marry:
If a female was compelled to consent to marriage due to fear of being killed, the marriage will be invalid. The father is guilty of depriving his daughter of her independent right to choose her marriage partner.
Mufti Abdullah Patel says about forced marriages:
In the Name of Allah, the Inspirer of Truth.
Assalamu Alaikum Warahmatullahi WabarakatuhAll the scholars agree that “offer and acceptance” (Al-Ijaab wa al-qubool) are amongst the pillars of marriage. Both bride and bridegroom must agree to the marriage contract, in order for the marriage to be valid. Forced marriages are a misnomer (an incorrect or unsuitable name) in most cases. I don’t think many persons are “forced” to get married. What we must stress here is where someone is coerced into a marriage contract, employing both physical and emotional pressure, it is not permitted, and a highly reprehensible act.
Sure, at times, persons may have family pressures to get married to so and so, which can be termed an “arranged marriage” of some sort. One wishes not to rock the boat and gets married to this person, whilst quietly regarding it as a kind of coercion. Whilst that may be the case to some extent, Islam gives the undeniable right NOT to get married, so one should refuse quite clearly if one is not comfortable for whatever reason – this is your Islamic right.
(1) Hadhrat Abu Hurairah (R.A) narrates that Rasulullah (sallallahu alaihi wa sallam) said, “A previously married woman should not be given in marriage until she is consulted (i.e. gives her consent directly and verbally) and a virgin is not to be given in marriage unless her consent is taken. The Sahabah (R.A) enquired, “How does she give her consent?”
Rasulullah (sallallahu alaihi wa sallam) replied, “By remaining quiet.” (i.e. a virgin’s silence is considered as her approval).
(Bukhari and Muslim)
(2) Hadhrat Khansaa Bint Khizaam (R.A) narrates that her father gave her in marriage against her wish while she was previously married (i.e. not a virgin). She came to Raulullah (sallallahu alaihi wa sallam) and he rejected the Nikah. (Bukhari).
To conclude, forced marriages where the bride or bridegroom have not agreed to marry, are not permitted or accepted in Islam. Where, the persons have been convinced and pressured into agreeing to marry a person, then the act itself may not be permitted, however the marriage itself is valid and accepted.
And Allah knows Best
Lastly, Mufti Ebrahim Desai has two other fatawa, previously referenced on this website about this issue:
See this fatwa by Mufti Ebrahim Desai [db]:
“Knowing the importance and sacredness of a marriage commitment, the boy and girl having consulted with their seniors and making Istikhaara, should make their own independent choice.
They should not be compelled to marry against their wishes as the consequences (non-compatibility, divorce, disputes, custody of children, etc.) are too ghastly to bear. Parents should not compel their children to marry against their wishes due to economic status reasons.”
As well as this fatwa by the same Mufti (Islamic Jurist):
“As an adult, you have an independent right to choose your marriage partner. You should not be forced into marrying someone against your choice. Those forcing you are guilty of depriving you of your Shar’ee right and committing a major sin,
You should simply say no if you are not confident of marrying against your choice. The consequences of forced marriages are too ghastly. There are great possibilities of a marital breakdown. That will lead to disunity among many families. The matter will be clouded even more if there is a child born through the marriage. Considering the many negative consequences of a forced marriage, you should never give in to being forced to marry against your wish. It will be you and no one else who will have to bear the burdens in future. You may forward this email to those forcing you to marry against your wishes.”
In conclusion – in the case of our Muslim Sister Nada al-Ahdal, both forced marriages (as seen above) and honour killings (as detailed in this link) are completely forbidden acts in Islam. We celebrate that she has stood up against an unIslamic practise and that she has defended herself against being wronged by seeking the rightful authorities – may Allaah ta ‘aala continue to guide her and preserve her, Ameen.
Calling Christians 
You see a little girl who knows nothing about life, getting asked if she wishes to marry an adult man cannot know that this means she will soon start having intercourse with this man (if she even knows what intercourse is, God forbid) and not long after will start having children. So her silence can be explained that way.
Another way to explain her silence is that she will not think it is her place to say no to this, since her parents are enthusiastic about this marriage. If the parents were not enthusiastic about this marriage, the child would not even be asked, because if the parents say no, the minor has no chance or marrying that person.
And what is so striking that it is well known that pedophiles in court often state that the young girl did not resist, giving himself an excuse for his actions by supposedly not knowing she did not want this to happen. And we know that this is typical for little girls and boys, to simply go along with it since they are not sure if this is wrong or right and they are afraid and too shy to speak out against an adult, let alone their parents.
So your ruling in Islam is completely backward I’m sorry to say. Because even if you ask the childs consent, the marriage is still legal if she does. This legal child marriage (which is indisputable) may cause mistakes, like the one made in the case of this Yemeni girl, to occur easily. Something which would never happen if child marriage is banned altogether.
This is why you have these problems. You can’t simply allow child marriage from an Islamic Sharia perspective and then when these terrible problems like the Yemeni girls case happens say “this is not Islamic”. Islam is what has kept child marriage alive.
It is exactly the same with the problems surrounding female circumcision. There is misconduct where people take away too much and damage the young woman and/or do it against their will. And then you say this is not Islamic. But Islam has embraced female circumcision. I admit, it has less severe conditions for this practice than what is often the case. But again: if you would have banned this practice altogether there would not be a misunderstanding and you will have no problems with people taking female circumcision too far.
The moral of the story is: accept your responsibility and acknowledge that Islam is the reason that people are doing child marriage and female circumcision, all be it that they take it too far. Which simply means they are following Islam but taking it too far. They are not following Hinduism. They are following Islam and making the mistake of misinterpreting the conditions for the practice. If you take the practice away entirely these problems will disappear.
Thank you for your time.
As a Christian, is your responsibility not to be dishonest (as per the 10 commandments). Your issues have been answered:
1. She is too young to know what this entails – incorrect, once she is baligh (mature – has had her period), it is the responsibility of the Wali (guardian) to explain what rules and rights, responsibilities come with being mature. Including acts of a sexual nature and the required purification from such acts (ghusl). So yes, when marriage is concerned, she would be told of these things.
2. She can think what she wants, you are assuming the young woman (as she is no longer a child – a child is one who has not reached the age of sexual maturation), is making such a decision in front of a room of persons or her parents. To the contrary, she is making the decision with her Wali (guardian) and it is advisable to have two witnesses of her choosing to advise her on the proposal:
See:
(Source: http://www.daruliftaa.com/question?txt_QuestionID=q-17484973)
3. You’ve also contradicted yourself in saying a young woman would not be able to speak out for fear of her parents – which is contradicted by the fact that this 11 year old Muslim girl did. So either you are lying, or the girl herself did the impossible.
4. Marrying a girl out of fear, i.e. not putting her silence into context, is haram and considered forced and thus illegal. Simply because you’ve failed to understand what the context of the various levels of her silence means, does not mean we have not.
5. There is no such thing as child marriage in Islam. Scientifically + Bilogically, once a child has their menses, they are no longer a child but a young adult. According to the Shari’ah they automatically become adults at the age of 15 if they do not have their menses or for males – wet dreams:
(Source: http://askimam.org/public/question_detail/15636).
6. As for female circumcision, it is a legal practise in the United States, or the form of which Islam allows, it is referred to as a clitoral hoodectomy and costs usually in the thousands of dollars at highly priced plastic surgeons. You seem to not know that what Islam allows, is perfectly legal in most 1st world nations as a luxury:
https://callingchristians.com/2012/04/27/a-treatise-on-genital-mutilation-in-islam/
7. In conclusion, Islam does not permit child marriages and both Muslim and Christians and Jewish scholars and teachings permit marriage from the age of puberty:
8. Therefore your claims against Islam, have not only been proven false, but you yourself should be ashamed that what Islam teaches is legal (in the case of circumcision) and in terms of marriageable age – legal according to Christian and Jewish theological sources. As a Christian, you should be ashamed of your fear mongering, dishonest and hypocrisy, go and repent.
The problem with the Christians is that in terms of laws they have a “modern secular liberal” mindset, while only in church-matters do they come out as Christians.
The authenticity of the whole story is put to question:
http://www.majalla.com/eng/2013/07/article55243853